The Search for Sarah’s Successor

Parashat Hayei Sarah – 5768

Our parsha this week begins with the death of our first Matriarch, Sarah. And yet, a goodly portion of the parsha focuses on the search for the person who comes to take Sarah’s place. No, I’m not talking about Keturah, Abraham’s second wife. She only takes Sarah’s place on the personal, private level for Abraham as a man. Rather, I want to focus on the search for the woman who takes Sarah’s place as a Matriarch for the Jewish People–Rebecca. Chapter 24 of Genesis tells the tale of Abraham charging his servant (whom the Midrash informs us is Eliezer) with the task of returning to Aram to select a suitable wife for Isaac from among Abraham’s family.

The outline of the story is familiar to us: Abraham makes Eliezer swear to return to Aram to find an appropriate wife for Isaac. He is, under no circumstances, to allow Isaac to wed a Canaanite woman, nor is he to return Isaac to Aram. Thus, he is to use his own judgment in finding a wife for Isaac. Eliezer asks Abraham, "What if I find an appropriate candidate, but she refuses to accompany me back to Canaan?"

"In that case," Abraham replies, "you are absolved of this oath."

As Eliezer approaches the town, he makes the following vow to God (Gen 24:14): "Let the maiden to whom I say, ‘Please, lower your jar that I may drink,’ and who replies, ‘Drink, and I will also water your camels’—let her be the one whom You have decreed for Your servant, Isaac." No sooner has he completed this thought than Rebecca comes to the well, behaves in the exact manner that Eliezer specified in his oath, and Eliezer is reassured that God has indeed directed him to the appropriate wife for his young master. At that point, Eliezer asks Rebecca who she is, and when she tells him that she is from Abraham’s family, Eliezer knows he is home free. The rest of the story—how Rebecca’s family treats Eliezer, and the negotiations for the marriage—are mere details.

The rabbis of the Talmud (Ta’anit 4a) and the Midrash (Leviticus Rabba) have a difficult time with the vow that Eliezer swears at the well. Their complaint is that it is a rash oath, and could have ended badly for Eliezer. Suppose someone totally unacceptable showed up, and nevertheless passed the "test" that Eliezer had established in his vow. What would Eliezer have done? They compare his behavior to that of the judge Jephthah, who swore an oath to God that if he were victorious in battle against the Ammonites, he would sacrifice the first thing that came out of his door upon his return home, only to find his daughter running towards him at his arrival. Jephthah ended up sacrificing his daughter (Judges 11:30-40).

However, Rabbi Y. Horwitz, a modern commentator quoted in Itturei Torah (a collection of mostly Hasidic commentaries) has a different take on Eliezer and his vow. Eliezer, he says, was not a disinterested party in securing a wife for Isaac. He had a daughter whom he had hoped to marry off to Isaac. His daughter, having been raised in Abraham’s household, was not a Canaanite idolater, and would have been acceptable. And yet, he was charged—under oath—to search for a mate for Isaac in Aram, Abraham’s homeland. Eliezer was concerned that if he relied solely on his own judgment, his natural desire as a father to see his daughter wed to Isaac would cloud his judgment. For this reason, he put the matter in God’s hands. And God, understanding Eliezer’s motivation, provided for a favorable outcome.

For Rabbi Horwitz, the importance of an agent’s putting his principal’s interests above his own personal interests in fulfilling his agency outweighed the danger of relying on God or miracles in fulfilling one’s duty. In more general terms, the lesson we take from Rabbi Horwitz’s understanding of this story is that we must do whatever we can to ensure that we don’t allow our personal feelings or potential personal gain to influence our performance in missions undertaken on behalf of another, or on behalf of society. This is a lesson that many of our public servants and corporate executives could well review.

Shabbat Shalom.